On Differences and Silent Acceptance

Hello Again.

A quick note from me today..

Sometimes, have you ever wondered why someone might have different interests? Sometimes we feel puzzled by differing opinions, and their priorities can be very different from ours. 

We might place something as our last priority, while for them, it’s the first. Sometimes, without compassion, we question our discomfort with them.

But are we aware that they, too, are different due to their unique fate? Just as they don’t question the destiny they’ve been given, perhaps it’s better for us to simply remain silent.

Bye..

Kisah aku di Family Mart: Menyelami Rindu yang Tersembunyi

A Cradle That Never Held My Baby

Semalam… aku singgah di Family Mart Jelatang. Dalam kekalutan mencari barang, aku tidak sengaja melanggar bahu seseorang. Dia menoleh ke arahku dengan raut marah. Aku segera mengucapkan maaf sambil tersenyum, namun dia hanya merengus sambil mengusap perutnya yang membesar, suaminya di sebelah turut memandangku dengan tatapan seolah-olah aku adalah pesalah. Aku tahu dia sedang mengandung, tetapi sikapnya begitu kasar.

Hati ini terasa hancur melihatnya. Andai anakku masih ada di dalam rahimku hari ini, perutku pasti sudah membesar seperti itu juga, menunggu hari. Dan sudah tentu, bayi ku akan lahir pada bulan Oktober ini…

Rasa sakit ini semakin menyakitkan. Kenapa dia perlu mencebik seolah-olah aku patut merasa bersalah? Seharusnya, sebagai bakal ibu, dia sepatutnya berasa bahagia sama seperti aku pernah merasakan kehadiran seseorang di dalam rahimku. Entah mengapa, wajahnya yang mencebik marah itu membuatkan hati ini semakin terluka. Tapi aku doakan kau baik-baik saja, wahai bakal ibu. Aku mungkin tidak pernah merasai saiz perutku membesar seperti itu, kerana kedua anakku pergi sebelum sempat aku memeluk mereka. Jarinya terlalu halus untuk kulihat dan belahan tangannya terlalu kecil. Perutku mungkin tidak besar untuk kuusap, tetapi aku ikhlas mendoakanmu, ibu. Semoga kau selamat dan baik-baik sahaja.

Hari ini, aku menangis sepuasnya. Baru kini aku sedar, aku belum benar-benar menangisi anak syurga ku yang kedua. Kerana semua orang menyuruhku sabar, tabah, dan redha. Kamu semua menyuruhku melepaskan dia dengan hati yang terbuka dan tidak meratapi pemergiannya. Namun, aku belum sempat menangis. Aku belum sempat merintih dan merindui kehadiranmu, sayang. Maafkan mummy… Insya-Allah, tunggu kami di syurga ya. Kedua-dua kamu sangat nakal, membuat mummy dan daddy berharap tetapi tidak pernah muncul di dunia ini. Maafkan mummy kerana tidak pernah menangisi pemergianmu. Mummy fikir mummy cukup kuat untuk tidak menumpahkan setitik pun air mata, tetapi sebenarnya, mummy juga seorang wanita yang lemah. Dan hari ini, air mata ini adalah untukmu.

Kepada semua… aku tahu aku belum benar-benar merasai beratnya ujian menjadi ibu dan bapa. Aku mungkin tidak tahu bagaimana menguruskan mereka kerana mereka pergi ketika aku sedang bersiap untuk menyambut mereka ke dunia. Ya, aku tidak tahu bagaimana membesarkan anak, menggunakan ilmu parenting, atau merawat mereka ketika sakit. Aku tidak pasti bagaimana rasanya melihat anak membesar.

Namun, satu perkara yang pasti, aku benar-benar memahami rasa kehilangan anak. Aku tahu bagaimana rasanya melihat anakku tidak bernyawa dan tidak bergerak dalam rahimku. Aku merasai setiap detik ketika menyaksikan anakku dimandikan dan dikuburkan. Aku juga tahu betapa pedihnya ingin menyentuh jasad mereka, namun merasa gentar kerana mereka terlalu kecil untuk kupegang, takut jika aku akan menyakiti tubuh kecil itu. Aku hanya mahu mereka sentiasa dalam keadaan sempurna di dalam kubur kecil itu.

Dan aku tahu, mungkin ada yang berkata… aku hanya melihat mereka pergi sebelum sempat hidup di dunia ini. Kamu mungkin akan berkata ibu yang kehilangan anak yang sudah dibesarkan itu lebih hebat, lalu kau katakan aku tidak layak untuk meratapi kehilangan ini? Tidak layak untuk menangis kerana tidak pernah melihat mereka hidup? Tahukah kamu betapa sedihnya aku kerana tidak tahu bagaimana wajah mereka seandainya mereka lahir? Bagaimana suara mereka jika mereka menangis, kerana mereka tidak pernah menangis… Betapa sukarnya merindukan mereka kerana aku hanya mampu mengingati rasa hadirnya mereka berada di dalam rahimku, tanpa wajah yang boleh diingati, tanpa suara yang boleh kukenangi.

Kesedihan ini tidak pernah berhenti, kerana apa yang hilang dariku adalah bukan sekadar sebuah kehidupan, tetapi sebuah harapan, sebuah cinta yang tidak pernah sempat kusentuh. Dan di sebalik semua itu, aku hanya berdoa agar mereka tenang di sana, dan aku akan terus mencintai mereka, walau di manapun mereka berada.

With a heart full of memories,

' Ain

Introducing a New Voice: Izzairin Zulkaflee

Hi There,

It’s been a while since I last blogged about other bloggers. I still remember how 10 years ago we used to make posts about our blogger friends, especially to introduce new bloggers who joined our community kan? So today I nak introduce sahabat I yang baru sahaja membuat posting pertamanya pada minggu lepas. Alhamdulillah masih lagi ada kawan kawan baru yang nak berblog. Untuk pengetahuan you all, she was the one who encouraged me untuk meneruskan dunia blogging ni to share my thoughts and feelings. Especially pada ketika itu I baru sahaja dilanda musibah dan very depressed. Dan kerana itu lah my first posting here, tentang kehilangan anak syurga I, Khadeeja setelah sekian lama I stop untuk membuat entry. Thanks Izzairin.

By the way, kawan I ni very talented in writing poetry.  Di dalam IG beliau, penuh kata kata indah hasil karya beliau. Seriously bakat beliau memang hebat. Jadi kerana itu terpanggil I untuk memberikan cadangan  kepada beliau untuk mengumpul kesemua puisi beliau di dalam blog. Lebih mudah untuk melihat hasil tulisan beliau yang sangat indah. It would be a shame to let such talent go unnoticed. At the very least,  bila beliau melihat karyanya tersusun elok di dalam platform blogger ini, it will surely akan memberikan inspirasi buat beliau berkarya hebat lagi. So, I am proudly introducing my friend’s blog:

https://izzairinzulkaflee.blogspot.com/

Dan dengan rendah hati, saya memohon sahabat sahabat blogger I yang di kasihi untuk follow blog beliau and offer words of encouragement so she continues to create wonderful work.

Till we meet again,

' Ain

Herbal Aromatherapy inhaler stick - Sunnahloka (Version Deep Sleep)

Hello, wonderful people!😍

Today I nak share my experience using the herbal inhaler stick from Sunnahloka. Previously, I mentioned that I couldn’t give any feedback on the product because I was already sleeping well and couldn’t provide a proper review. You can check out the previous post here . Tapi I sekarang sudah pun guna almost 2 weeks now. What I can say that this product sangatlah function teruk kat I. I’ll tell you about this “Deep Sleep”. Apa yang I noticed ialah:

1. Ada satu malam ni, which was last night, I rasa dah start nak kena imsonia. Lepastu, my husband pun gave me the “Deep Sleep” inhaler, and surprisingly, I was able to fall asleep. I pun tak tau berapa lama I ambil masa untuk tidur kerana ianya sangat sangat cepat. Tak sempat pun nak kira kambing biri biri melintas pagar tu.

2. Selalunya bila I tidur,  I often wake up in the middle of the night and need to go to the toilet. I memang tak boleh nak elak, otherwise, I have trouble falling back asleep. Tapi bila I dah pergi toilet and buang air, dia akan buat tidur I tergangu dan boleh menyebabkan I tak dapat tidur dan rehat yang cukup. I end up feeling like I haven’t slept enough. However, ever since I started using this inhaler, especially the “Deep Sleep” one, tau tau nak Subuh dah.

Oh, and I just found out that this product is from Fatin Nabila, who was once viral dulu dekat tiktok yang antara video dia pernah dikecam oleh natizen akibat cara penyampaiannya yang tak bersesuaian,  but she has since apologised. One of her TikTok videos ada juga beritahu yang she experienced anxiety disorder, which led her to create this product. Kudos to her. This product is really helpful. You can check out her TikTok here.

Until next time, keep smiling!

' Ain

I pernah kena fitnah dengan bomoh

Cerita pasal fitnah bomoh ni, teringat dulu ex BF pernah tuduh I bomohkaan dia dan isteri dia. Kisahnya ex BF I ni bercinta dengan I adalah dalam 3 tahun kot. Taklah lama sangat.. Cuma membazir jugaklah masa tu sebab masa kami start couple umur sangat sangat muda. Bila fikir balik, banyak benda lagi berfaedah boleh buat selain bercinta.

Anyway, we broke up because he found his future wife. Maybe I wasn’t what he was looking for, so we ended things on decent terms. I takde pun serang serang dia ke, serang bakal wife dia ke. Cuma of courselah I ada juga menangis kat bucu katil  huhuhu.. masa tengok gambar wedding dia. Tapi masa tu sedihnya  kejap je and I dapat move on dengan berjayanya.

Fast forward 10 years, and he was in the middle of a divorce with his wife. Well, benda benda gossip macam ni.. akan ada je seseorang akan sampaikan kat kita. Sebab I masih belum kawin lagi masa tu. Maybe I terlalu berhati hati. Tapi masa tu pun I dah ada pasangan dah and nak prepare untuk kawin pun. Out of the blue, my ex sends me a message on Facebook:

Ex BF: "Sudah sudahlah tu buat benda khurafat. Apa yang awak dah buat dekat abang dan isteri sampai bercerai. Berdosa Besar”. Bla bla bla..

I macam blur je masa tu. Tapi I replied:

Me: "kalau I nak bomoh mestilah 10 tahun dulu. Ni bukan kene bomoh ni, hati kau yang dah berubah lah kat bini kau".

And cerita tu sampai situ je. Sebab I macam menyampah dengan that situation. But I sampai harini even dah bersuami pun masih disturbed dengan tuduhan tu. Kadang kadang teringat balik, I rasa macam nak je sumpah dia macam macam. Sebab I rasa unfair sangat. Dahlah dia tak pernah minta maaf buat I heart broken lepastu gi tuduh I bomoh kan dia pulak. Padahal dia yang nak bercerai. Kenapa I pula di salahkan .Geli pun ada sbb cerita pasal 10 tahun dulu. Dahlah masa dia tuduh tu I macam dah move on lama. Plus, I have no reason to be jealous; I’m happily with someone better now.

Tapi itulah I syak lepas dia dan wife dalam proses nak bercerai tu ada pergi bomoh and tengok kenapa bercerai kot.And mesti bomoh tu fitnah I . Hahaha. Whatever, Allah knows best. Cuma Bila I baca kes Arwah Zulfarhan baru baru ni, teringat kes I ni.

All because of a so-called BOMOH!

Refleksi Hari Merdeka

 

Kemerdekaan Malaysia dan Personal Growth

Hari ni ialah Hari Kemerdekaan Malaysia yang ke 67 tahun. I realise that this year, my mom is also turning the same age. And when I look at my mom, I realise that Malaysia, too, has matured and grown older. But is Malaysia truly maturing? Dan ketika kita menyambut Hari Kemerdekaan today, this is actually the perfect time for all of us to reflect achievement negara kita dan juga ourselves. Hari Merdeka ialah simbol kebebasan, perpaduan, dan juga kebanggaan negara. Sambil I merenung perjalanan Malaysia menuju kemerdekaan dan kedaulatan, I terreflect my journey menuju kedewasaan pula, what I have been through dan bagaimana ia saling berkaitan dengan makna Merdeka itu sendiri.

Perjalanan Malaysia Menuju Kemerdekaan

Masa kita belajar Sejarah em.. masa sekolah rendah dan menengah, kita sedar bahawa perjalanan negara kita, Malaysia untuk mencapai kemerdekaan adalah dengan bukti semangat dan juga ketabahan rakyat Malaysia itu sendiri. Pada 31 Ogos 1957, Malaysia, which is sebelum ni dikenali Malaya, mencapai kebebasan dari pemerintahan kolonial British.Of course I dengar macam macam cerita dari nenek I. Bagaimana dari zaman penjajahan Jepun sehinggalah British. Bagaimana nenek I rasa makan ubi bakar dalam tanah, menyorok dalam perigi buta dan lubang buatan..Bagaimana nenek tiada peluang untuk pergi ke sekolah and that the reason kalau cakap pasal kerajaan dan kemerdekaan negara, nenek lebih hebat menunjukkan kesetiaan terhadap negara. I can see it from her eyes.

Hari bersejarah ini menandakan permulaan era baru, penuh dengan peluang dan cabaran. Perayaan kebangsaan mencerminkan keunikan budaya negara, kemajuan, dan cita-cita bersama rakyatnya yang majmuk.

Bagi I, Hari Merdeka bukan setakat tentang memperingati peristiwa sejarah, tapi ia adalah perayaan identiti Malaysia yang unik, gabungan harmoni masyarakat pelbagai kaum, dan perjalanan berterusan untuk mencapai matlamat nasional. Hari ini sekiranya tiada diisi dengan perarakan yang meriah macam dulu dulu pun, tapi seharusnya lagu-lagu patriotik, harus dimainkan bagi mengukuhkan nilai-nilai perpaduan dan kenegaraan. Mestilah kena dengar lagu-lagu seperti Saya Anak Malaysia, Warisan, Bahtera Merdeka dan semestinya Tanggal 31 Ogos dan banyak lagi lagu lagu patriotik yang kita harus dengar. Just to let you know, I’m now enjoying ‘Bahtera Merdeka’ by Aishah.

My Merdeka: Perjalanan Kematangan I

Sejujurnya, in my personal opinion, tentang Hari Merdeka  has a special meaning, especially when I reflect on my own journey. Just like perjalanan Malaysia untuk mencapai kemerdekaan yang involved bagaimana nak mengatasi cabaran belum lagi dengan segala kemungkinan-kemungkinan yang akan berlaku, and my journey of life pun berkisar pada mencapai kebebasan dan my own self- improvement. I remember bagaimana I nak dapat Master Degree, I hanya lah pemegang Diploma yang sangat-sangat lama ok? I tak dapat naik pangkat, naik gaji it just because I ada Diploma je. This drove me to achieve my goals. It was only in my early 30s that I resumed my degree and Master's studies. I pun sendiri terperanjat sebab my result semua cemerlang. Alhamdulillah. Sedangkan masa mula mula I nak ambil Degree, after a long break from studying, my mom ada lah menimbulkan kerisauan dia kat my sister. Dia takut I might struggle and give up. My sister of course bagitau I. That moment, I rasa tercabar sangat and I will make sure all my result cemerlang. Dan Alhamdulillah, my results were indeed quite commendable.

Menggalas Tanggungjawab

For me, kematangan mestilah bermula dengan deeper understanding of responsibility. Sama seperti negara kita, perlu mengurus pemerintahan yang penuh complex ni, dan keperluan masyarakat yang macam macam ragam, tak sebut lagi pergaduhan politik yang buat I muak. I can relate dengan my personal maturity, of course ianya melibatkan untuk menggalas tanggungjawab terhadap tindakan dan keputusan kita. In whatever keadaan, kita kene ambil tanggungjawab tu  samada dalam kerjaya kita, hubungan, ataupun personal goals kita. Seperti negara yang membuat pilihan yang bijaksana dan bertanggungjawab atas hasilnya, yang mencerminkan tanggungjawab lebih luas yang dimiliki oleh sebuah negara terhadap rakyatnya, kita. Macam tu juga dengan kita. We choose our path. Kita memilih perkahwinan ini, jalan ini, hidup ini, kerjaya ini. Dan kita mesti mengambil tanggungjawab terhadap pilihan-pilihan ini. Whatever challenges we face, we must take responsibility.

Memahami dan Menghormati Kepelbagaian

Malaysia ni mempunya rakyat berbilang kaum dan seharusnya aspek penting lain dalam pertumbuhan adalah untuk mempelajari, untuk menghargai dan juga menghormati diversity. Kekuatan Malaysia terletak pada kepelbagaian penduduknya, dan I realise that the personal growth melibatkan prinsip yang sama. Embracing different perspectives and experiences memang membantu my understanding and empathy, making me more open and adaptable in various aspects of life. I think about how, memula I berkahwin dengan my husband, seriously banyak je ketidaksamaan tu. Of course ianya berbeza. Dia dilahirkan dan dibesarkan dari keluarga yang berbeza dengan I. Kalau dia suka makan cencaluk tapi I pula suka makan petai dan buah binjai. Tapi tulah.. sekarang ni husband I yang suka makan binjai jeruk even more than I do! Dari ketidaksamaan membawa kepada banyak persamaan. We adapt to each other’s lives.

Merayakan Pencapaian dan Belajar dari Kegagalan

Sama seperti Hari Merdeka adalah masa untuk meraikan pencapaian Malaysia especially masa diorang bersatu padu untuk menentang penjajah,we should also recognize and celebrate the challenges they faced., Yes, it is an achievement worth celebrating.. That’s why, I never judge pun kalau nak diadakan perayaan sambutan merdeka. Asalkan ianya tidak keterlaluan sehingga menyumbang kepada kemaksiatan.

Pandang ke Hadapan

Malaysia sekarang terus berkembang dan maju. Dari negara pertanian sehinggalah sekarang negara yang maju dan berkembang pesat. Begitu juga myself. Hahah.. dari berat 45 kg pun maju naik angkanya sehingga nak melebihi 60 kg. Jadi sempena hari kemerdekaan ini, I ambil spirit of independence, unity, and progress to guide my own life. Personal improvement is an ongoing process that requires introspection, learning, and adaptation.

Last but not least, please ignore my 'Bahasa Rojak.' The important thing is that the meaning gets across. This is not a language competition but just an expression of my thoughts in a style I’m comfortable with.

Selamat Hari Merdeka kepada semua rakyat Malaysia! Semoga kita semua terus maju jaya, I love you Malaysia. 

' Ain

Herbal Aromatherapy inhaler stick - Sunnahloka

Hi There,

Recently, I've been suffering from insomnia. Sampai satu minggu I tak boleh tidur. My husband dah risau. At that time husband I takut I kene ganguan dengan makhluk halus. After all, benda macam ni pun berkemungkinan juga kan. Lebih lebih lagi sebelum tu, I ada duduk kat luar masa azan Maghrib. Manalah tau, ada benda benda yang tak baik mengikut. Jadi, husband pun bagitau dengan my in laws. Malam tu jugak diorang bawak ustaz datang rumah I. 

Tapi lepas Ustaz scan I, Ustaz pun tak jumpa apa apa yang pelik. It means, nothing yang gangu I. Ustaz kata maybe I ni lonely.  hahahhahah. Lonely in what way?? Whatever lah. 

So dah macam macam cara I dan husband cuba untuk I boleh tidur. Termasuklah applying  magnesium oil kat kaki, taking melatonin gummies,  hoping they would help me sleep. Oh lupa nak mention yang I also tried the military sleep method tu and it worked. You can Google it to find out how to do the exercise. Tapi I noticed, selain dari that tip, I ada juga pindah tempat tidur. I don't know the connection, but it help me sleep. which is nyenyak sangat.

And today I want to share what my husband bought for me. I really love it. Tapi I tak boleh nak review lah samada ianya bantu I tidur atau tak sebab masa product ni sampai, I memang dah boleh tidur. However, what I can say is that ianya sangat memberikan ketenangan. I suka gila.

Here’s the product that my husband bought. Actually, there are several flavors. You can check out the picture I posted below. Product from Sunnahloka. Dia macam inhaler brand vics tu cuma yang ini infused dengan essential oil and ada bidara extract.  Baunya pun sedap dan tenang je. 

With Love.

' Ain

My RM50 Haul from Jalan Jalan Japan!

Hi There,

Today I want to share some random stuff I bought from Jalan Jalan Japan. Tapi kan I rasa merepek lepas balik rumah. Benda merepek yang awalnya I rasa sangat lah berbaloi. Kenapa berbaloi? Percaya tak yang I boleh dapat 8 barang dengan RM50.  So let’s see what I bought.

1. Beg ni harganya RM5. plannya nak isi telekung . I beli sebab dia ada lace dan ribbon. I sejenis yang girlie macam tu ye. But once I got home, I haven’t decided what to use it for yet.

2. Bakul ni I beli RM 6. Ni I dah jadikan tempat I letak Al-Quran dan tasbih semua. It has its function. But then I thought that baskets from DIY stores are cheaper and prettier. This basket is literally just an empty basket with no brand.

3. The moment I nampak je I terus suka. I suka design bunga bunga kecil macam ni. Harga nya RM 2 je. So cheap. I just haven’t decided what else to do with this beg bunjut ni

4. I suka sebab konon konon nanti nak pergi pantai nak bawa barang dalam ni. ala ala beach bag lah camtu. Cuma  tadi I dah masukkan barang make up I. I memang tak sabar. Harganya ialah RM6.

5. Another beg bunjut RM3 that I haven’t decided what to do with yet.

6. Ni I suka sebab ada bunga kecil juga. And memang masih baru lagi.

When I got home, I realized it’s from Uniqlo Paris. The price was unbelievable—RM2. It’s clean, new, and the bag is quite functional. But I’m still hanging it up because I don’t know what to do with it. I banyak gila beg. 

7. I beli beg ni. Tak tau jenis apa. Trust me, it looks ordinary in the picture, but it’s actually beautiful and very spacious up close. I plan nak letak all my journal and planner dalam ni. I tried it earlier, but I’m not sure yet. It was RM15.

8. What’s this called, a shawl? I beli sebab dia brand Ralph Lauren. Tak tau lah authentic ke tak. Harga RM 10. Balik rumah try nak jadikan alas meja tak cantik pulak. So ni pun masih di dalam discussion kat dalam my mind. Apa I nak buat dengan dia ni !!!!!

That’s all the stuff I bought today. I’m really happy to have gotten so many things at such a low price. However, I still haven’t decided what else to do with all these items. I just bought them first. tapi husband I cakap. " Its ok sayang. yang penting happy". Hehe..

Sehingga kita berjumpa lagi ye..

With Love,

' Ain

Subway - boycott ke tak eh?

 Hi,

Saja nak share, Btw, I ada share dekat thread jugak tapi still nak post sini. Kisah pasal boycotting. Pengalaman yang tidak dapat dilupakan jugak lah.

I once got scolded by sorang makcik ni at Petronas station near Sungai Besi. At that time, I was extremely hungry and the boycott was still new. Dah lah baru je balik kerja dan nak travel back to Melaka pulak. So, we ended up eating at Subway. Bukan sebab tak nak boycott tau. At that time we were just really hungry, all the other places were full, and we needed to eat something to take our medicine. (masa tu dah melebihi timing pun). Actually I dan husband kene makan supplement and medicine for TTC.

And masa tu, we were still getting used to the boycott and completely forgot about it. When the auntie scolded us and pointed at the Subway brand ( yang terpampang besar tulisan SUBWAY dekat dinding restoran), I looked at my husband and asked, “Wait, are we supposed to boycott Subway?”

My husband then only started to realize, “Oh, right, the boycott lahh..” We were really clueless and had no intention of breaking the boycott. Honestly, we lost our appetite at that moment. Terus bungkus makan dalam kereta. Memang lupa sangat like memang honest mistake. Rasa menyesal sangat dan malu pun ada. selamba badak je duduk berdua macam orang lupa diri dalam tu. Dah lah restoran tu dindingnya kaca. Semua orang nampak ... Patut lah kitorang je couple dalam tu. Allahu.

' Ain

Housewife Reality Check

Hi There, 

So, I've been doing a lot of soul-searching lately and wanted to share where I’m at. Back in January, I decided to leave my job at BIMB Investment to focus on being a housewife. My goal was to be the best wife and mother I could be. However, Allah’s wisdom has made me realize that I might not be quite ready for motherhood just yet.

Being a housewife has its perks, don’t get me wrong. There’s something fulfilling about managing a home and being there for your family. But it’s also been a bit of a rollercoaster. I used to love the routine and the feeling of earning my own money. My husband is a gem and supports me in every way, from letting me indulge in shopping sprees to treating myself on Shopee. Yet, there’s something missing – that personal sense of achievement from earning my own paycheck.

The career I had was more than just a job; it was a source of purpose and independence for me. It wasn’t just about the money, but the confidence and fulfillment that came with it. So now, I’m thinking about whether going back to work might help me find that balance and fulfillment again.

I’m going to take some time to weigh my options and figure out what’s next. I’ll definitely keep you all updated on what I decide to do.

Until Next Time,

' Ain

Finding Light in Darkness

 Hi There,

 

It has been a long time since I last wrote. Recently, I experienced another personal challenge which I find difficult to discuss in detail. This trial has made it very hard for me to navigate life, but I believe it is simply a test from Allah. Despite the hardship, I trust that these experiences are strengthening me. I often question why these struggles seem to affect me and my family more than others, but I remain confident in the wisdom behind them. Through it all, I strive to grow stronger and more resilient.

To all who facing difficulties, please stay strong in the face of adversity. Remember, Allah does not abandon us. Instead, He guides us through our challenges out of love and a desire for us to grow into better individuals. These trials are opportunities to strengthen our faith and to draw closer to Him. Trust that every challenge is a chance to become stronger and closer to Allah.

 

Until Next Time,

‘ Ain

Every Journey Is Unique

 There is someone who says, 'Being pregnant at this age (in my 40s) is exhausting,' and I ask, 'Is it true?' She responds, 'Yes, it is,' questioning if it's still feasible to get pregnant at this older age. She expresses reluctance, stating that she is already weary.

However, this person has five children and can distinctly differentiate each childbirth experience. Some were challenging, some more straightforward. Of course, the last one was inevitably more tiring and draining. But I choose to perceive it positively.

I tell her, 'There's no difference for me in giving birth to a first or second child because I haven't experienced either.' I emphasize that there's no contrast for me between delivering at a young or older age because I haven't gone through it. Our phases differ, our paths aren't the same. So, everyone has their own unique experience and that's what makes each story special.

"P.S. I also have an adopted fur baby who joined the family

Blooms of Love: Choice Between Fresh and Artificial Flowers

Hi There,

 

Today, I want to talk about flowers. My husband recently got his master's degree, and I was excited to find the perfect bouquet for him. Luckily, there were many flower stalls at UKM with a variety of blooms, priced between 80 and 200, and some even more expensive. But, I faced a dilemma because the flowers were so beautiful, and the choices overwhelmed me. I also had to decide between fresh and artificial flowers.

Some say fake flowers last longer without wilting, ensuring that your love remains as enduring as artificial blossoms.

Hmm... I was almost about to buy them because, yes, I do want my love to last like those artificial blooms.

As I looked at fake flowers in a store, I kept looking back at real ones. It made me think about why I had to choose. Real flowers are full of life, but they don't last forever—they naturally fade away, like life does.

On the other hand, fake flowers never change. They stay pretty forever. But, they miss out on the real experiences of life, like growing in the sun or swaying in the wind. So, choosing between real and fake flowers is like choosing between something that doesn't last but has a real story, and something that looks good forever but misses out on real-life moments.

Basically, deciding between real and fake flowers is like thinking about whether we prefer things that last a short time but have a real story, or things that look good forever but miss out on the ups and downs of real life.

You can probably tell my choice. Live flowers will fade away, but that's just how life works. Artificial flowers, on the other hand, will never wilt, but they also never really experienced life.

Until Next Time,

'Ain

A Heartwarming Journey at UKM Convocation

 Hi There.

Yesterday, I had the honor of attending my husband's convocation ceremony at UKM. And, congratulations, my love—you are now officially a master's degree holder. I couldn't be prouder of you.

I went with my in-laws, and only two people were allowed in the hall. I then extended my respect to my mother and father-in-law. For me, what my husband has achieved is the result of the prayers of his parents. But... I didn't have to wait outside completely.

Beyond the degree recipients and their parents seated in the Tun Abdul Razak Chancellor Hall (NECTAR), those without designated seats found a welcoming space in the Dewan Gemilang, conveniently located next to Nectar. The venue was quite comfortable, equipped with air conditioning—a relief. Additionally, my younger brother joined the celebration, bringing delicious food that made it feel like we were enjoying a movie with the large screen. A heartfelt thank you to UKM for providing such a comfortable and accommodating environment.

Inside Dewan Gemilang

It was a proud moment as everyone stood to pay respect during the playing of Negaraku. It has been a while since I attended any event with our national anthem, and I couldn't help but feel a sense of pride.

I will be uploading more photos later, as some of them are still in my younger sibling's camera.

Congratulations, my dear. I love you.

Until Next Time,

'Ain

Harini Happy Sangat: My Love for Planner and Journaling

Hey there, Planner Lover! Harini happy sangat! I can't contain my excitement, and I'm eager to share why. By the way, I'm a big fan of planners and journaling, and today is an extra special day because the planner I ordered is finally here.

Let me tell you why I have this deep love for journaling:

1. Functional Planning is My Jam

One of the main reasons why I adore journaling is because I love planning. There's something incredibly satisfying about laying out my goals, to-dos, and schedules in a visually appealing way. I'm all about functional planning that helps me stay organized and on top of things.

2. Documenting Life's Moments

Another aspect of journaling that brings me joy is capturing the moments that make up my life. Whether it's a small victory, a heartwarming experience, or a lesson learned, I love jotting down these snippets. It's like creating a timeline of memories that I can revisit whenever I want.

3. Brain Dumping – Therapeutic and Enlightening

And then there's the therapeutic aspect of journaling, especially the art of brain dumping. Pouring out my thoughts, feelings, and ideas onto paper is not only cathartic but also eye-opening. When I go back and read what I've written, I often discover new perspectives or solutions to challenges that seemed daunting at the time.

So, why am I exceptionally happy today? It's because the planner I ordered has finally arrived! This time, I opted for a local leather planner from "The Buku Girl." It's my third time ordering from her, and let me tell you, the craftsmanship is top-notch. I've also tried planners from Moterm and Yard and the leathersmith, and each has its unique charm. I'll delve into the details of each planner I own in a future post.

For now, let me give you a sneak peek into my latest addition – a personal-sized ring planner. Check out the video below for a closer look at the beauty of my new planner from "The Buku Girl."

I can't wait to fill the pages of this planner with my dreams, plans, and the beautiful chaos of life. Stay tuned for more detailed insights into my planner collection. Until then, happy planning and journaling, Planner Lover!!

Until Next Time,

Áin

Younger Generation: Semakin tak bertamadun?

Hello there,

I'd like to share my thoughts on the younger generation today. I must admit, I am genuinely find them quite impressive. Their self-presentation is empowering, especially in the corporate world. They excel in communication and presentation skills, and their language proficiency is truly praiseworthy. However, I've noticed a lack of empathy and manners at times. It's crucial, nonetheless, to show respect to elders in the workplace, as some lessons come from experience, not just academics.

It's sometimes disheartening to witness potential gaps in the current generation. Could it be that the higher their academic achievements, the lower their morals and manners? Shouldn't these aspects progress hand in hand?

Reflecting on my own learning days, I recall the "Tamadun Islam", where a society becomes civilized through the harmonious blend of good manners and knowledge, not knowledge alone. Indeed, is it appropriate for me to express concern about the potential decline of civilization with the current generation?

I recognize that some may see me as old-fashioned, voicing outdated sentiments. You might believe that manners are irrelevant. Not to mention bangsa dan agama lain…Still, I'm confident that all religions teach goodness. For the younger generation following Islam, it's crucial to remember that MANNERS are still emphasized in Islam.

Until Next Time,

'Ain

Viral Bus Driver Kiss: False Accusation

 Hello There,

Recently, there has been a viral story about a female bus driver who is said to have engaged in inappropriate behavior inside the express bus she was driving. Recordings show a middle-aged man appearing to behave intimately with the female driver, and it's been said that because of their carelessness and distraction, the bus got delayed by three hours..

But a married couple sitting behind the driver disagrees with these claims. According to them, they had a clearer view of both the driver and the co-driver. The husband and wife say that the man accused of kissing the female driver didn't do what people are saying. Instead, he was just fixing the radio in the driver's headrest. They think the viral video is unfair because it doesn't show what really happened and only catches the incident from the wrong angle!

Talking about a three-hour delay, I couldn't help but wonder if perhaps Allah intended to protect her from something harmful. Regardless, it's essential to be cautious before spreading any information. We don't know the whole truth, and sometimes it's better for someone to remain silent.

Love, Lessons, and Life's Journey

In life's journey, there are moments that reveal the true essence of love. Alhamdulillah, recent challenges have taught me profound lessons..

Understanding a husband's love is beyond than fancy gifts like gold and gems. It's seen in vulnerable moments, like when you're sick and he cares for you, staying by your side, even when he's unwell himself.

Family is more important than titles and awards. When you're sick, it's not about having parents with prestigious titles but having those who are healthy and there to comfort you. True happiness comes not from having lots of friends but from siblings who might hurt you sometimes yet in moments of sickness, they become your greatest concern.

In life's journey, real friendship shows itself when things get tough. You, personally, figure out who truly stands as a friend..

Uniqueness of My Journey

Hello There,

I've come to realize that I'm a bit unique. Everything about me happens at its own pace. I started with just a Diploma initially. But then, while working, I decided to pursue a Degree. And even though I was a bit behind others, I went on to obtain a Master's degree. Alhamdulillah, I stand here now, and some ask, "Why pursue a Master's? Is it really worthwhile?" Is it wrong? I pursued it for the love of knowledge. 

Even during class, one lecturer asked, "Why do all of you want to pursue a Master's?" Responses varied. Some wanted to increase their income, and yes, most students answered this way. Because with the qualification, you get promoted and your salary increases. Some answered for the connections, a valid pursuit. Here, I met friends with businesses, from HR, and various fields. But why, when I say it's for knowledge, does it sound unrealistic? I mean, have we normalized the idea that life is solely about money, and seeking knowledge sounds fake? Yet, my pursuit was genuine—I sought knowledge.

Btw, My life's milestones arrived a bit later than usual. Let me list them down:

1. Got married a bit late.

2. Had children a bit late. (Actually, not yet, as my child passed away.)

3. Took my career seriously a bit late.

However, at the end of the day, whatever I desire in life, everything is granted by Allah. It's just a bit delayed. But I still feel fortunate because there are people who haven't yet achieved what they desire, even though some have. Some are still searching for happiness, even though they got married really early. But some are happy even though in their youth, they shed tears. So, in conclusion, our journey is very unique and different."

Until Next Time,

'Ain

Supporting Local: Lets eat Burger Ramly

Hello There,

The issue of Palestine and Israel is currently in the spotlight, and everyone is talking about boycotts. It warms my heart to witness individuals embracing the power of boycotting, but it's important not to insult workers or those unable to participate. Surely, they have their reasons.

For me, boycotting is a wise and impactful effort, but it needs to be done right. Don't just do it impulsively. It's pointless if, for instance, McDonald's employees lose their jobs because of a three-month boycott. In the spirit of boycotting, let's support local economies. For instance, if you can't drink Starbucks, try a local coffee shop. If you can't eat at McDonald's, let's boost the business of our local burger , Abang Ramly. By channeling our preferences towards these small businesses, we not only contribute to their growth but also become significant contributors to our country's economy. Who knows, McDonald's employees might even find new opportunities there.

Until Next Time,

'Ain